Question

a) my husband is very angry person ofen he will get angry very soon little things soon if I will talk to him he will get angry... Before marriage also I worked, after marriage also iam working I feel tired and i feel depression. I feel nothing is there in my life. b) I have been marreid for 3yrs, but not happy with my family ife. me and my husband have lots of issues. he hardly tells anything, hides everything, does not talk to me. we live as complete strangers in one house.

Answer

Every tear of a believer is precious. Allah loves us more than seventy mothers do. Allah looks at the sincerity of our hearts and our actions.

May Allah bless you with piety (Taqwa) and purity, strong emaan, forgiveness of sins, have mercy on you, elevate your status, bless you with knowledg Deen and generosity. Ameen!

You are an obedient daughter, a caring sister and a Muslimah who has already given big sacrifices in your life, you may want to handle this situation with patience. When the family is not so religious (pious or Allah fearing), you may work on them to make them pious - via good teachings and good manners.

Masha Allah, an educated sister like yourself, in this age group, would seek more good deeds to get closer to Allah through Dua, Zikr, Quran, serving your community and other sisters.

please study this article:
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Winning the Husband ' Saving a Marriage!
http://www.islameasy.org/SaveMarriage.php

Forgiveness and Winning the Heart:
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Remember the teaching of the Islam to win the heart:

' Repel evil with good deeds;

' Join relations with the one who cuts it with you;

' Make Salaam to one who does not make Salaam;

' Forgive those who did bad to you;

' Keep politeness in all talk, with respect and love;

Allah says in the Noble Qur'an:

'The good deed and the evil deed cannot be equal. Repel (the evil) with one which is better (i.e. Allah ordered the faithful believers to be patient at the time of anger, and to excuse those who treat them badly), then verily! he, between whom and you there was enmity, (will become) as though he was a close friend.' [41:34].

'But none is granted it (the above quality) except those who are patient, and none is granted it except the owner of the great portion (of the happiness in the Hereafter i.e. Paradise and in this world of a high moral character).'[41:35].

The Prophets made so much effort so that each everyone realizes the purpose of life, gets an opprtunity to make Taubah. The pious belivers in the Ummah also made an effort so that their families and neighbors can discover the sweetness of Islam. In this effort, a believer is steadfast, forgiving, patient, trustworthy, kind and caring.

This life is a one-time opportunity to achieve everlasting happiness in the life hereafter. Allah Almighty is showering countless blessings upon us everyday. Every moment has a great potential to achieve high-ranks in the court of our Creator. Every minute is like a gold coin. The heart and tongue are gifts from Allah to earn millions of rewards (Hasanaat) for the Akhirah.

People cannot give respect or honor -- only Allah can grant peace, love, contentment of heart, a blessed life in this world and in Jannah for true believers. Difficulties and trials can become a means of raising our status and earn countless reward. You should make all your worries, doubts and concerns in the form of Dua to Allah - example:

Yah Allah I was astray from straight path for so many years, but You have hid my faults and gave me hidayah!

Ya Allah I tried to do good but Shaytan deceived me - only You can show me the path to Jannah!

Ya Allah I am helpless and distressed and You have all the treasures of comfort, mercy and happiness.

This life is all about controlling desires and protecting from the traps of Nafs (self) and Shaytaan. This is a temporary life where desires and feeling may not be fulfilled completely - the place for enjoyment and desires is Jannah. This life is all about responsibilities, fulfilling others rights and following the commands of Allah and Sunnah.

Daily reading a book of good deeds with your husband helps in this situation. You may print a chapter of Muntakhab Ahadith

http://www.islameasy.org/quick_books.php

and read with your husband for 10 minutes together, then make Dua.

http://www.islameasy.org/pdf/Emaan.pdf
http://www.islameasy.org/pdf/Belief_Hereafter.pdf

And Allah knows best.

Ask Alimah Team

Note: The rulings giving herein are based on the religious rulings of the Islamic Law and do not have any implications on the Law of the Country. The rulings given hereunder are specifically based on the question posed and should be read in conjunction with the question. AskAlimah.com site bears no responsibility to any party who may or may not act on this answer. AskAlimah.com site being hereby exempted from loss or damage howsoever caused. This answers may not be used as evidence in any Court of Law without prior written consent of the web site.

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