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Answer

Dear sister, At this time you are depressed and lonely, that is why you are having such thoughts. Sometimes things don't happen the way we want it to, however, our belief as Muslims is in taqdeer and the decisions of Allah SWT. Many a times we feel that we are the only ones going through difficulties while everyone else seems happy, in reality this is not true. Every person in this world is tested by Allah SWT, but each in a different way. Remember that Allah SWT will give you a partner, when it is the right time and the right person. Put your trust totally in Allah SWT and accept that if this is the decision of Allah then it is best for you at this time. Allah SWT tells us in the Quran, "..Do not become despondent of the mercy of Allah." [39:53, part of the verse]. It may be better that you are single right now, than having a partner that may add to your grief and worries. The Prophet of Allah SAW has said, "The world is a prison for the believer and paradise for a disbeliever." If your life is feeling like a prison right now, then take glad tidings in the words of the prophet SAW because this is a sign of your Iman. It is mentioned in a narration, there was a believer and a disbeliever from the previous nations, they both left home one morning to catch some fish, the disbeliever took the name of his gods and cast his net, when he lifted it, it was full of fish. The believer took the name of Allah and cast his net, at the time of sunset he lifted his net to find only one fish, which jumped out of his net into the water. So the believer returned home empty handed while the disbeliever went home with a net full of fish. Upon seeing this, the angel that was appointed for the believer felt very sad. When he returned to the skies that evening, Allah SWT showed him the abode of the believer in jannah, upon seeing it the angel said, by the qasam of Allah, nothing will hurt him anymore once he reaches this jannah, then Allah SWT showed him the abode of the disbeliever in jahannum, to which the angel said, by the qasam of Allah, nothing of the world will benefit him once he reaches this abode. (Tambeehul ghaafileen) The life of a believer is full of trials and tribulations, Allah swt has promised us, "Verily the patient ones will be given their rewards in full, without any reckoning." [39:10] The prophet SAW has told us to look at those who are less fortunate than ourselves. When you feel depressed, think of those who are worse off than yourself. Dear sister, instead of praying for an early death, ask Allah SWT to remove the difficulties that you are facing and make your tasks easy. After all He is the one with all the power and might, He can change things if he wants to. The prophet SAW has prohibited us from asking for death. Sometimes our prayers are not granted immediately because it is best for us, if a prayer is not answered in this world then it is kept for the hereafter, it is reported in a narration that the angels in the skies recognize the voice of a believer who supplicates to Allah continuously and, when the believer will see the rewards for the duas/ prayers that were unanswered, he will wish that Allah had not answered ANY of them and had kept them all for Aakhirah. Lastly, make sure that your life is in accordance with the commands of Allah and his prophet SAW, our success lies in this alone. Affiliate yourself with the masjid and scholars in your area. Spend your time in the remembrance of Allah and the hereafter, this will remind you that life is just passing by, in a short time we will be standing infront of Allah. Please feel free to write to us whenever you need to and let us know if you feel better. Sometimes we just need to change our perspective, to see life in a totally new way, May Allah SWT remove all your difficulties and grant you ease, barakah and contentment, Aamin

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