Question

I live far away from my parents with my husband and his parents our marraige is 7 years old now. my husband always says me that he doesnt love me he got married to me because his mother told him he fullfills all my needs. when ever i object on his late coming home and saying these dry words to me his mother and he criticizes me she says see haven't my son spend so much money on you, he takes to hotels and then are you objecting on our last vacation to india, i told my parents about my problem my father got angry and ask my husband about all this he told him I am like this only, if not take your daughter home; they don't keep a servant; when i told my parents they told me if we go for separation can you live without your children, i dont know what to do .. please advice

Answer

Marriage is a great Sunnah whilst divorce is disliked by Allah. Rasul sallallahu alaihi wa sallam has said that if a woman asks for a divorce for no reason, then the smell of paradise is forbidden for her [Tirmidhi].

It is the responsibility of both husband and wife to give 100% effort to make their marriage successful and their home peaceful and Islamic. Divorce is permissible only as a last resort.

Ask yourself the reason of your husband's mistrust. Is this his personality? If so, resort to patience, Salaah and Du'a. In most cases, this is because of his lack of confidence, therefore always reassure him of your love for him. If your husband does not trust you because of a
previous error, then seek to regain his love and confidence by displaying your love for him, regret (on the mistake), and make commitment to the marriage. Be ever cautious of not repeating the same error that had caused
the problem.

In any case, do not leave the home without his permission. Do not visit places he dislikes etc. Insha Allah, with patience, Du'a and effort your husband will come to trust you.

Serving your husband is an ibadah. Abu Hurairah narrated that the Rasul sallahu alaihi wasallam said, "If a women prays her five daily prayers,fasts the month of Ramadhaan, guards her chastity and obeys her husband,it will be said to her, "Enter paradise from whichever of the gates of
Paradise you wish"

May Allah Ta'ala help and guide us in our decisions and actions. Ameen!

InshaAllah, with your effort and good character, your spouse will feel like doing the same.

You can recite Ayat 21 of Surah Rome [Qur'an 30: 21]

Besides this you should read YA Wadoodo and YA Salaamo 21 times everyday.

May Allah will make it easy for you. Ameen!

Kindly review some of the advices on
'Happy Marriage ' Living with Peaceand Harmony at Home' at our main page
http://islameasy.org/Marriage_Advice.php

Cure for depression
http://islameasy.org/Cure_Depression.php

And Allah knows best.

Ask Alimah Team

Note: The rulings giving herein are based on the religious rulings of the Islamic Law and do not have any implications on the Law of the Country. The rulings given hereunder are specifically based on the question posed and should be read in conjunction with the question. AskAlimah.com site bears no responsibility to any party who may or may not act on this answer. AskAlimah.com site being hereby exempted from loss or damage howsoever caused. This answers may not be used as evidence in any Court of Law without prior written consent of the web site.

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