Question
I am form India. I met a muslim who is working in USA, we chatted thru internet and I prayed Istekhara. After praying I was more inclined towards him, we carried on chatting for few months and then he tried to avoid or stay away, one day he said sorry and told lets leave on Allah and be just friends, which was really hurting and I told him I can't be a friend and carry the relation, we discontinued. I prayed Istekhara the same day and many times Alhumdulillah had good dreams and feelings. Now after 3+ months, I have the same strong feelings towards him. I am really very much confused and don't know what to do, if the seperation was from Istekhara, then why I still have feelings and strong view for him, if the istekhara is good then why he cut-off? If you can help in understanding I will be really greatfull and may Allah Bless you as well.
Answer
The following steps should be taken. 1. Repent to Allah SWT. Chatting to a non mahram is beyond the limits that Allah has set for us. Allah SWT says in Surah Al-Israa (17) " And do not go near adultery." This means that along with the actual act of zina all actions that will lead one to zina are also not permissible. Therefore chatting via the internet or the telephone, dating, etc and any actions that lead one to zina are forbidden. Additionally, in Islam there is no such thing as 'friends' with strange man. Repentence constitutes the following: * Regret. * Firm commitment not to repeat the action. * Seeking Allah's forgiveness. Remember that Allah SWT is the Most Merciful and the Most Forgiving. 2. Talk to your parents. It maybe that they are not aware of your need to marry. 3. Make Dua to Allah and be patient. If this man is in your taqdeer, no one can stop this and on the other hand if Allah SWT does not want this for you, there is nothing that you can do to marry him. Keep in mind that Allah SWT is the best of planners. Trust in Allah. 4. Involve yourself in good actions so that your mind will be occupied. Attending religious lectures, serving your parents, helping the needy etc. are some suggestions. May Allah Ta'ala grant you a husband that will be the coolness of your eyes. Ameen!And Allah knows best.
Ask Alimah Team
Note: The rulings giving herein are based on the religious rulings of the Islamic Law and do not have any implications on the Law of the Country. The rulings given hereunder are specifically based on the question posed and should be read in conjunction with the question. AskAlimah.com site bears no responsibility to any party who may or may not act on this answer. AskAlimah.com site being hereby exempted from loss or damage howsoever caused. This answers may not be used as evidence in any Court of Law without prior written consent of the web site.
Share :